Therapy for the woman who's everyone's rock
You're the capable one. The one people lean on. And privately, you're tired—and quietly afraid that if you ever stopped being useful, no one would stay.
Does any of this sound familiar?
- You're high-functioning at work and in crisis at home—or quietly the other way around.
- You over-give in relationships, then feel invisible or resentful when it isn't returned.
- You can name your feelings on paper, but in your body you mostly feel “on” or numb—not much in between.
- You shape-shift to keep people close. You read the room before you check in with yourself.
- You grew up as the steady one—the kid your parents leaned on—and now having needs of your own feels selfish or unsafe.
- Your throat tightens, your chest braces, or you go quiet at the exact moment you most want to speak.
- Therapy that's only talk hasn't quite landed. You understand the patterns. You just can't seem to feel different.
How we'll actually work together
This isn't insight-only therapy. We work in three layers, often inside the same session.
We catch the pattern in real time. The micro-second your “competent self” rushes in to manage a feeling instead of letting you have it—that's where the change happens. We slow it down until you can feel it.
We listen to the parts of you that learned to hide. There's a younger part of you who decided long ago that being needy wasn't safe. We talk to her, instead of overriding her with logic.
We let your body finish what it never got to. We don't just talk about anger or grief. We twist a towel, push against a wall, find the voice in your throat that got silenced. Your nervous system finishes the sentence it started years ago.
What I specialize in
- Anxious attachment and pursue-withdraw patterns
- Self-abandonment and chronic over-giving
- People-pleasing, perfectionism, and shape-shifting
- Shame, freeze responses, and feeling “too much” or “not enough”
- Boundary work that holds in your body, not just in your head
- Nervous system regulation for chronic alarm, dread, or shutdown
A body-based, parts-aware approach
Somatic therapy means working with what your body is doing right now, not just what your mind thinks about it. Your body holds the story your words can't quite reach.
Internal Family Systems (IFS) treats you as a whole person made up of parts: the over-functioning protector, the small one she's protecting, and the steady self underneath both. We help them stop fighting each other.
EMDR is a structured way to process old experiences so they stop hijacking the present. It's particularly useful for relational and early-life trauma that words alone can't reach.
You won't be lectured at, scripted, or given homework that feels like a performance review. The work is real, and it moves at your pace.
Going deeper on one of these
The patterns above show up differently for different people. If self-abandonment and chronic people-pleasing are the loudest part of your story, you might want to read more here:
Healing the Good Girl: therapy for chronic people-pleasers →
How we can work together
Online
California & Washington via secure telehealth
How to get started
Free Consultation
Schedule a 20-minute call to see if we're a good fit—no pressure, no script.
Book Your First Session
Pick a time that works for you. Sessions are online via secure telehealth.
Begin the Work
We start where you are—at your pace, in your body, with steady support.
